Mosezina vignette

Oncology patients are encouraged to visualize the cancer cells leaving their bodies and to even talk to their illness. I did both. Just as Moses tried to persuade Pharaoh to "Let my people go," I dressed as Mosezina, attempted to convince the cancer to "Let my body go!" I felt called to drive the cancer out of my body using humor and a positive attitude.

I warned my nasty, sinful cancer cells of the plagues I would rain down upon it. I began with my first surgery: the slice-and-dice plague. It did not deter my evil enslaver. I warned them before my second surgery, "Let my body go, or I shall cut you to pieces." Those hard-hearted tormentors refused to release my body. When my lymph nodes were clear, I thought those rapidly dividing little devils were finally listening and I would soon be free of the bondage.

Mosazinah's Ten Commandmends

I gave those stubborn cells every opportunity to release me. I warned them of the horrors of chemo. "Let my body go, or I shall call a poison down upon you. You shall crawl on your belly and your tissue shall rot." (Hey, I was desperate and I knew one of us was going to be crawling on their belly.) Those deceitful devils were undeterred. I was forced to raise my IV pole to the heavens and call the chemo curse down upon those crafty cancer cells.

My body continued to be rebellious. I climbed Mt. Sigh-I and received Mosezina’s Ten Chemo Commandments. I was instructed to give the Is-Real life cancer clan the sacred laws listed to the right.

As for me and my body, the obstinate cancer devils refused to free me. I warned those hard-hearted souls of radiation, "Let my body go, or I shall burn you in a fiery furnace." They refused to listen. I was forced to subject them to the final plague. Yet good would prevail. The week of Christmas 1999, I parted the white-coated sea of medical personnel and crossed over into the promised land of cancer-free.